Every once and a while, I run across something that slips past my guard and tugs hard and quick at my heart. Last night I was watching a family movie with my mom when I felt that punch. In the scene the very vanilla completely dressed couple were simply getting into bed when the husband rolled her to her back and covered her with his body to kiss and nibble at her while they chatted. It may be a basic and common practice between couples, but that tender, loving moment squeezed the breath from me. I missed my Daddy so terribly I had to fight back tears.
The first night we were together, He held me tight for hours. It was like He was determined to make up for every night I'd spent alone for the last 10 years and every night I'd spent in misery the 10 years before that. He slowly and firmly stroked my body, not to seduce me to open my thighs but to open my heart. I'd never before felt so wanted, cherished, and loved. I'm not sure if He felt it, but I remember how I trembled in his arms. I was afraid of that tenderness even as with each touch I discovered how starved I was for affection. Daddy fed me that night and the next and every night we've spent together since, knowing more than I how much I need the simple and sweet side of love. My heart is in His hands as I've given it to Him without reservations.
Over the last year, Daddy and I have spent many long hours tucked under covers or in the nest. Those are some of my sweetest memories of 2012. Long slow deep kisses. Little kisses and cuddles. Petting and tight hugs. Quiet heartfelt whispers. Healing tears. Laughter and giggles. Sighs and whimpers. I simply adore being wrapped in M's heat, a delicious tangle of arms and legs. My memories of those simple, sweet moments with my Daddy warm me every night as I fall asleep.
I can't wait to add more memories in the coming year. ~sigh~